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To Sum Things Up
Ok, today is thursday. It is really remarkable how many things can happen in just a span of a little more than half a week.
Said in my previous post that i was feeling very down because i didn't make it into interact. I took the pains to appeal and finally i was rewarded with a place in the club. However, I will only be an official member of the club after second intake and i cant help but agree with what waimin said. She said that all my efforts will go down the drain if i cannot stay in hc. Therefore i am keeping my fingers crossed and hopefully i will be able to stay in hc.
Secondly, school stuff. Haiz, had 2 tests so far this week and i think i flopped both of them. Although many people keep reminding me that this is only the beginning of the year and that the tests only have a very minute impact on my overall grades, I really wonder if this goes on, how am i suppose to survive in this highly competitive environment. All those homework ( lecture exercises and tutorials ) is killing me!!! How am i suppose to finish all of them when i am not even given the time to do it.
Went for talentime auditions today. Khee xuan and i sang "our story" by tension and as quoted from khee xuan, we didnt really wow the judges but we also didnt go off tune and that is something positive we can take from today's audition. Haiz, i really hope to be able to do something so that i can be proud of myself, but apparently the hope of getting into the finals of talentime is getting farther and farther away.
Now getting into the really painful stuff.
All the above factors only contributed a little to my distress. What hurts me the most is the emotional pain i have to get through everyday in school. Everytime i see a couple walking by, i really feel like crying. Why cant i do that too? Why must u always be in another place from me? I feel the increasing distance between the two of us and you know it too. In fact you were the one who told me about it. But I cannot think of a way to reduce the distance, and if this goes on, i think i will eventually succumb to the harsh reality.
This mental stress is driving me crazy. That is why all of you see me singing sad songs all the time and being extremely emotional. I really cannot help it. This kind of stuff cannot be solved by a third party apparently, so i guess i really have to carry all this load upon my shoulders.
You're beautiful. You're beautiful.
You're beautiful, it's true.
I saw your face in
a crowded place,
And I don't know what to do,
'Cause I'll never be with you.
How apt. This describes my exact sentiments. But to all those people who only see the most-of-the-time cheerful side of me, you wouldnt understand the pain deep down.
Said in my previous post that i was feeling very down because i didn't make it into interact. I took the pains to appeal and finally i was rewarded with a place in the club. However, I will only be an official member of the club after second intake and i cant help but agree with what waimin said. She said that all my efforts will go down the drain if i cannot stay in hc. Therefore i am keeping my fingers crossed and hopefully i will be able to stay in hc.
Secondly, school stuff. Haiz, had 2 tests so far this week and i think i flopped both of them. Although many people keep reminding me that this is only the beginning of the year and that the tests only have a very minute impact on my overall grades, I really wonder if this goes on, how am i suppose to survive in this highly competitive environment. All those homework ( lecture exercises and tutorials ) is killing me!!! How am i suppose to finish all of them when i am not even given the time to do it.
Went for talentime auditions today. Khee xuan and i sang "our story" by tension and as quoted from khee xuan, we didnt really wow the judges but we also didnt go off tune and that is something positive we can take from today's audition. Haiz, i really hope to be able to do something so that i can be proud of myself, but apparently the hope of getting into the finals of talentime is getting farther and farther away.
Now getting into the really painful stuff.
All the above factors only contributed a little to my distress. What hurts me the most is the emotional pain i have to get through everyday in school. Everytime i see a couple walking by, i really feel like crying. Why cant i do that too? Why must u always be in another place from me? I feel the increasing distance between the two of us and you know it too. In fact you were the one who told me about it. But I cannot think of a way to reduce the distance, and if this goes on, i think i will eventually succumb to the harsh reality.
This mental stress is driving me crazy. That is why all of you see me singing sad songs all the time and being extremely emotional. I really cannot help it. This kind of stuff cannot be solved by a third party apparently, so i guess i really have to carry all this load upon my shoulders.
You're beautiful. You're beautiful.
You're beautiful, it's true.
I saw your face in
a crowded place,
And I don't know what to do,
'Cause I'll never be with you.
How apt. This describes my exact sentiments. But to all those people who only see the most-of-the-time cheerful side of me, you wouldnt understand the pain deep down.
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